Trusting God to look after our children.
One of those things it is easy to write and so hard to do.
I’m a risk averse person and a risk averse mama. I would like my kids to never ride a motorbike/jet ski/horse/surf board/helicopter/you get the idea. Sedentary hobbies, please.
Worry worry worry
I know I’m not alone in experiencing a greater degree of anxiety since I’ve had children. Frankly, there is more to worry about. For me, it started immediately at an early pregnancy scan. I saw the precious baby wriggling on the screen and I had an overwhelming feeling that, Lord willing, this child will outlive me and I won’t be there to hold his hand through life’s ups and downs.
Of course it continues with every twist and turn of babyhood. And as our precious ones launch out into the world, we cannot protect them from the sharp edges and the uncomfortable places.
But it also feels like a paradox: as I get older and apparently wiser, surely I should be calmer and my trust in the Lord should be deeper. After all, I have known His faithfulness all my life. So why doesn’t it feel easier?
He who watches over me
Recently I have taken comfort from the Heidelburg Catechism. Solid gold, written in 1563.
Question 1: What is your only comfort in life and in death?
Answer: That I am not my own, but belong – body and soul, in life and in death – to my faithful Savior, Jesus Christ…
He also watches over me in such a way
that not a hair can fall from my head
without the will of my Father in heaven;
in fact, all things must work together for my salvation.
So this was a lightbulb moment for me: I trust this is true for myself. And so I must trust this is true for my children. Every little detail of their lives. Every joy and difficulty. Every hair.
He watches over them.
He watches over them.
I am not the world’s most decisive decision maker. Or at least, my voice of self-doubt has increased with parenthood. There are just so many decisions and the ramifications seem unknowable and enormous.
To begin with:
- Are you feeding your child enough and of the right things in the right way?
- Is your toddler ever going to stop throwing toys in the toilet or coloring on the walls?
- Will this school be good for your child?
- Or that one?
- Or homeschool?
- Should I enforce piano practice or will that lead to a lack of self-motivation?
- Is anyone else here an over-thinker?
- Will they make the right friends?
- Will they learn the right things?
- How will they deal with disappointments and rejections?
Where is my refuge?
So I need a rock, an anchor, a truth to get a grip on. How do we trust God with our children? This is the refuge and promised protection I am trying to remember:
“The Eternal God is your refuge and underneath are the everlasting arms.” His arms last forever. His comfort, His catching and holding, His securing, His establishing, His keeping safe. He promises it is so. For myself and each precious darling.
There still may be a place for keeping teenagers away from fast moving vehicles though. We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.